Episode 244 - You Don't Need to Deal With It Just Because You Noticed It

Hi I'm Keith and welcome to Lighter Than You Started. It's Tuesday and today I'd like to talk about something you've probably already done possibly several times. You've noticed something. That's all. Just noticed it.

Perhaps you walked into the kitchen and saw something that needed putting away. You opened your emails and spotted one that needs a reply. You passed the shelf and noticed the dust. You looked at the garden and saw something that needs cutting back. You remembered that cupboard you've been meaning to sort out.

You noticed somebody hadn't replied to your message and somehow the moment you noticed it became a job. I need to deal with that. It's interesting isn't it? Nothing about the scene necessarily changed. It was there five minutes ago But now you've seen it and apparently that means responsibility is transferred immediately to you.

Perhaps there's a small distinction that could make today feel a little lighter. Noticing something doesn't automatically make it urgent. I think our attention can be rather demanding. Whatever it lands on can suddenly feel important. You walk upstairs to get something.

On the way you notice a picture is slightly crooked so you straighten it. Then you notice something on the table that belongs downstairs. You pick that up. While putting it away you remember there's something in the kitchen you meant to do. 10 later you're standing beside the washing machine holding a screwdriver with absolutely no idea where you originally went upstairs.

Or perhaps that's just me. But our days can easily work like this. One thing leads to another. Not because we've deliberately chosen what to do but because every new thing we notice makes a little shame on us. While you're here you might as well.

They'll only take you a minute and some of those things really do only take a minute. The trouble is there are quite a lot of minutes. I think it will only take a minute may be one of the most expensive sentences in everyday life because it rarely travels alone. One minute becomes three. Three becomes ten.

And suddenly the thing we actually wanted to spend time on has been squeezed into whatever remains. Perhaps we need to become slightly more comfortable with seeing something and leaving it there. That sounds almost irresponsibly simple. You notice the washing needs folding and you don't fold it. Yet.

You see the email and you don't answer it. Yet. You remember the cupboard and astonishingly the cupboard remains unsorted for another day. Nothing terrible happens. The cupboard copes perhaps is a useful word in all of this.

Later. Later sometimes gets a bad reputation. We associate it with procrastination. Putting things off. Avoiding what needs doing.

And yes sometimes later is simply never wearing instruments in disguise. But not always. Sometimes later is a perfectly sensible decision. It means yes I've noticed this. Yes it may need attention.

No it doesn't need to interrupt what I'm doing right now. That's not avoidance that's choosing and there's a difference. Perhaps this matters particularly with digital life because technology has become extremely good at making us notice things. A red circle, a vibration, a banner, a little number beside an app, a message preview, an email subject line. Someone somewhere has done something and your device would very much like you to know about it immediately.

But knowing that a message exists doesn't mean you have to respond to it now. Seeing an email doesn't create an instant obligation to answer it. A notification is information. It isn't necessarily an instruction. I think that's worth remembering because otherwise our attention becomes available to whoever and whatever manages to reach it first and there will always be something.

Maybe there's an analogy here with walking through a town. You pass the shop window. You notice a shirt. You don't immediately think well I've seen it now I'd better buy it. You can notice something without acquiring it.

Perhaps we can do the same with tasks. Yes I see you. No you're not coming home with me right now. There's something quite freeing in that. Of course some things genuinely do require immediate attention.

If the bath is overflowing this probably isn't the moment to practice mindful postponement. If the smoke alarm is going off deal with that. If someone genuinely needs you right now respond. This isn't about ignoring what matters. It's about recognizing that visibility and urgency are not the same thing.

Just because something has entered your awareness doesn't mean it gets to move to the front of the tube. Perhaps a useful question today is does this need doing now or have I simply noticed it now? I like that distinction because often the answer will be I've simply noticed it. Wonderful! Now you have a choice.

Do it if it makes sense. Write it down if you'll need to remember it. Come back to it later or perhaps decide it doesn't need doing at all. That's another possibility we sometimes overlook. Not everything we notice needs improving.

The slightly untidy shelf may survive. The garden doesn't need to look like it came out of a catalogue. The email need not be an essay. The thing you suddenly realize you could do isn't automatically something you should do. We can create enormous lists from things that were never actually requirements.

They were simply possibilities. And possibilities don't all need to become commitments. Perhaps that's the sort I'd like to leave with you today. Your attention is valuable. Not in a productivity guru sort of way.

Simply because where your attention goes is in a very real sense where part of your day goes and your day is your life in small pieces. So perhaps don't give every piece away simply because something managed to catch your eye. Finish that cup of tea. Stay with that conversation. Complete the thing you're doing.

Keep walking past the crooked picture. You can come back or somebody else might threaten it. Or perhaps after three days you realize you even quite like it that way. So today when something catches your attention and immediately announces itself as another job perhaps pause. Ask does this need doing now or have I simply noticed it now?

Then decide. Because noticing something doesn't mean it gets to decide for you. Today's thought for you. You don't need to deal with it just because you noticed it. Thank you for sharing this moment and as always I hope you end today feeling lighter than You Started.

Go gently and I'll see you tomorrow on the flip side. You can now listen to the Lighter Than Started podcast on Alexa. Simply say, Alexa, play the Lighter Than You Started podcast. Lighter Than You Started is a think of something publishing production.